CHRISTMAS
UPDATE

 

 Sentient
              

 

 

This is our last newsletter of 2009 and thought that as 2009 has been for many a big challenge, we should end it with a smile or two. 
 
Below is a memo to send to all your staff this Christmas.
 
Office  Memo
 
To:              All Employees
From:          Management
Subject:       Office conduct during the Christmas season
 
Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Festive Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council).
  • Running aluminium foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged and will not give you tinsillitis.
  • Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden (it runs up an incredible long distance bill).
  • Work requests are not to be filed under 'Bah humbug'.
  • Company cars are not to be used to make do-nuts, handbrake turns or other 'Dancing on Ice' manoeuvres. 
  • All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE Dec 25 2009.
  • Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.
  • The stationery cupboard is not to be used as a group hiding place when the boss wants an 'end of year' chat.
  • Customer complaint letters should not be sent up the chimney for Santa to deal with.
  • The telling of excruciatingly bad puns is compulsory.
In spite of all this, the staff are encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.
 
Joke of the Day
 
The judge asked the defendant stood before him what he was charged with. "Doing my Christmas shopping early", was the reply. "That not illegal! How early were you shopping?"
"Before the store was open", he replied.
 
And finally....
the legal sector can have its wry moments - trust us! Here are a few interestingly named firms we have come across over the years:
  • Payne & Payne Solicitors
  • Wright Hassell Solicitors
  • Stephens Innocent Solicitors
  • Crosse & Crosse Solicitors
  • Mowl & Mowl Solicitors
  • John Itsagwede Solicitors

But our personal favourite has come from outside the legal profession: - 

  • Droopy & Brown

  Who, wait for it....... are wedding dress retailers!!  

All of us at Sentient hope you have a very Happy Christmas and peaceful New Year and we will be back with our regular informative updates in 2010.
 
 


 

 

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Sentient adj ...

"capable of perception"

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